I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away
are emotions like muscle tissue?
throughout today ive been slightly depressed from my friend savanah's suicide. i had her in my 4th hour class. i didnt want to go to school today so bad i was grumpy in the morning and didnt want to be spoken to. all this made me think and kinda got me in an emotional breakdown. i feel better now and im gradually getting better. but to explain the title...i was wondering if emotional pain makes you stronger when you heal...like muscle tissue when you're doing sports or something. i guess that it'd have to be true because how would we ever grow up if it wasnt? why does emotional "working out" have to be so hard? i really believe it is more physically demanding then going to the gym or anything. ive noticed the wisest people are the ones who have had the most life experience. and by life experience i mean seeing much pain and tribulation and also much happiness and joy. if anyone you know is thinking about suicide help them and if you yourself are considering...talk to someone, anyone, they'll listen. and just so everyone knows...im willing to listen and help the best i can. and i know many other people who are too. please dont put your friends through the pain of losing you. it's not worth it.
today was awesome. and...hmmm...yeah. i went to church which was boring. then i came home and the missionaries called and i went on splits with them for an hour. i drove them around in my big standard truck lol. and that was my day today. it was fun.
yesterday was the best day ever haha. me and 2 of my friends hung out. we went to brantley lake and nobody was there so we left and on the way home we saw a little watering hole. we stopped by it and saw goldfish and were like WHOA!! and went home and got fishing nets and went back and in the time we were gone it had rained a lot. lol it got all muddy so after we figured out the mud we took off our shoes. i went barefoot and i think they put their shoes back on. we seriously tried to catch fish for like 3 hours. we caught a bunch of minnows and 2 of the goldfish things. a little disappointing but still sentimental now lol. we were all muddy by the time we got done so we went to the brantley lake campground showers and cleaned off. then we all went home and they went somewhere else and i went to the movies and saw hitch with brittany and naomi. that was also awesome. that movie was so cool lol. will smith is awesome.
well yeah that has been my weekend thus far. i still have tomorrow to go
3 DAY WEEKEND! YESSSS!
i have two passions in this world right now: tennis and piano. ive learned i love playing piano. it's so awesome to sit there and learn new songs. the feeling of making beautiful music. listening to music is so strong a feeling. playing music is so much more. everytime i listen to a good song with a piano part in it im always like i wanna learn that song. note by note, line by line, you can create or learn beautiful sounds of harmony. music is an awesome part of life. it makes your days so much better to always keep a favorite song in your heart and mind.
i got my coldplay book today!!!! yesssssssssss!!! i ordered a coldplay piano book a while back and i got it today and it made me happy^-^ like that<< i dunno how to play anything yet but thats otay. ill learn them soon enough lol. well yeah that was about the highlight of my day today....bye!
MindSay Quick Update /
I am feeling lonely:( nobody replies to me:(
worst week of my life...
it all started...wednesday...yes...sonic in the morning before school...i was retarded...this is how it started:
well i was leaving sonic in the morning and i had been waiting for an opening for like 2 minutes (long time to sit and wait for me lol) and well this girl was coming and she looked far enough away that i could pull out and get into the turning lane and speed up and go but i guess she was going to sonic and i didnt see her signal and she didnt get into the turning lane until AFTER i started pulling out and then i pulled out and saw her blinker and i was like oh crap and then i braked and then she started to go into the turning lane and i hit her.
yup that's the story...but the first cop was funny. i was pulling my wallet out to get my license and a quarter fell out and he said you dont have to tip me! and i laughed. then a city cop came and was kinda stiff. and i sat there for like 45 minutes. i was late for school. thursday i went to court for this and i got referred to Teen Court so i could keep my license.
ya this basically ruined my week. and on top if it all i was sick. that didnt help much. and by noon wednesday everyone in town knew about it. fun stuff fun stuff. im a retarded loser. yes, yes indeed.
i havent updated in forever and a day...lol. anyone miss meh? so much has happened...i dont think i'll type it here lol. too lazy. ill talk about yesterday tho. i woke up at like 730am and went to play in the old-timers tennis tournament where the team plays old people volunteers. it was fun. i lost tho. those guys are good. the older they are the better lol. then after that was over about 230pm i went to sandons...and we played halo2 most of the afternoon. that was fun too. and that was my whole saturday. yay! today was church. and now im here. bored. yes.
i just woke up and the phone rang and my parents spazzed. ajoiersgypaiosrgypaoisrgya like that. and i got scared lol. o well. katie and shana, im goin to sandons...if y'all wanna go to the movies call me over there k? love! haha im sooo tired i just woke up.
do you like the new layout? katie and i made it! yay!
MindSay Quick Update /
I am discovering i am very bored
